Oh, Lonliness, please, stay a while. Tea?

I'm sorry, but talking to you right now is particularly painful for me and I'm not entirely sure but I know that it is. My eyes are wet and dry right now and it's weird... I wish... I wasn't where I am right now. I don't want to be dead but I don't want to be alive either. I'd rather be sitting somewhere between that. It's like a ache. A dull throbbing ache.

This obsession..

stop, pause but never rewind or fast ward

it's all about this moment

leave the past and present where they lay

just stop this moment,

don't let it continue.

please...

I don't want what we had

and I'm afraid of what may happen

patch me up, cover this gapping hole

just let me be still

I love being vulnerable.. being open to it all because once you're in this position the options are limitless. It's like an emotional drug.. I want it, crave it, I want someone to be there to make me vulnerable so they can take a piece of me and run with it. Hurt me, please?